Meaning, these hallmarks of femininity are indicators of someone who is sheltered, kept indoors, away from the elements, and away from the world.
Women wear makeup, because we don't have to sweat or go outside in the rain. We wear high heels because we don't have to run or walk anywhere. We wear dresses because we don't have to run or climb. We have long, perfectly styled hair because we don't have to worry about it getting caught in things. We wear painted nails because we don't have to use our hands. White women are deemed prettiest, because they don't go out in the sun. We shave our body hair because we don't need protection from the elements. We don't have scars because we don't come into contact with danger. We can't have wrinkles because we shouldn't age. We have to be thin, because we don't have to be strong and resilient in the face of life's challenges.
God forbid we actually went out and did anything.
This realization has caused me to struggle with how typical expressions of femininity play out in my feminism and in my gender presentation. Most of these typical feminine expressions are very impractical (as in, they take a LOT of time to execute), and many of them are designed for the male gaze (for example, heels put the body into lordosis*, pushing out the backside, which is also the position that female mammals assume when presenting themselves for mating behaviour+).
I struggle with the idea that women can participate in these feminine rituals solely for themselves. This is not to say that I believe that it's impossible - I know and respect a number of people who fully believe that women can and do engage in feminine expressions to satisfy themselves and no one else. I'm just saying that I am incredulous. Yes, wearing makeup or wearing heels can make you feel better about yourself. But is it an intrinsic feeling better? Or is it extrinsically motivated, even in the smallest way?~
As a result of this line of thinking, I have made many changes in my gender presentation over the years. As the wonderful artist, writer, and all-around amazing thinker Clementine Morrigan^ once said of her gender presentation, I want to simultaneously celebrate and subvert femininity. I am very proud of the fact that I don't shave my body hair, or typically wear makeup, or typically dress femininely, or wear heels. But I do wear makeup sometimes, and sometimes paint my nails, and sometimes I like to wear skirts (especially because it throws people off when they see skirt + leg fur). This typically happens when I go out, and yes, I'll admit, I do it because I feel better about myself, but I feel better about myself because I think these things will enhance others' appraisals of my appearance. The result of this is an experience of cognitive dissonance whenever I "femme" up my appearance.
I'll end by making it very clear that I respect however anyone wants to present their gender identity, and that I do not believe that engaging in feminine beauty rituals makes anyone a 'bad feminist.' That helps no one. We live in a world where, unfortunately, women are still valued for their appearances moreso than the contents of their hearts and minds, and there is a lot of pressure on women to present as typically feminine. I have no issue with others' gender presentations or identity - femme, masculine, androgynous, or anything in between - you do you, and for goddess' sake, love yourself and be happy with who you are. I just struggle with these thoughts sometimes, and thought I'd put them out into the world to see what comes echoing back.
* http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3206568/
+ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lordosis_behavior
~ (I am incredulous but also relish conversation and debate so if you'd like to speak to me about this then please engage me.)
^ http://clementinemorrigan.com/
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