and then there are the nomads and the people who live in caves

People actually live like this. Holy hell.

I knew it as a concept but never before now had met these folks in the flesh. I spent last night in an amazing hostel in the hills overlooking the Alhambra in Grenada. It was incredible. Not just because of the view and the general fact that I was there, but also because 90% of the folks who were staying at the hostel had been travelling for months on end with no end to their journey in sight, no 'home' or 'life to go back to.' Most busked, worked at hostels, or sold their wares to pay what little rent there was and buy beer, food, and other necessities. This is a life that can be lived.

I had the opportunity to quiz one young man about his life. He started travelling when he was 18, moved to Australia from the States, managed a restaurant, and in the past three years has been to Israel, Jordan, Greece, and now Spain, where he is working at the hostel I was staying at. Just, wild. When I asked him about his motivation, his reply was, "Because it's the truest truth I have ever known."

And of course this makes sense. Of course, upon meeting these folks, I was thinking to myself, "Man, I should just do this. What's stopping me?" Of course, I felt the urge to just drop everything and busk my way across the face of the planet. Or hole up in a cave somewhere.

But. But. There is some other voice inside of me that tells me that I would feel unactualized in this sort of life. This other voice tells me that, while travelling and living like a nomad would be incredible, I would not feel like I was doing enough to live up to my potential as a contributing sentient being. Of course, this is not to say that the nomadic life is without its unique challenges, or that these folks do not make an impact on the world around them. They were wonderful, warm people. It's just that I think I wouldn't feel satisfied and fulfilled.

But what do I know? For all I know, this concept of self-actualization through hard work is something that has been drilled into my head so that some capitalist can make money off of me, or because this is the way my parents were raised and so in turn raised me. Yes I feel this way, but why? And yes, I know that travelling for my whole life would be immensely satisfying, but why do I feel that living like a hippie nomad would not be enough for me? Is this just something I'm telling myself to justify my decisions?

I don't know. All I know is that I want success in a fulfilling career, and I want to travel the world and experience everything I can. And so I seek to carve out my middle path, to satisfy these two (opposing? I hope not) aspects of myself. I hope to achieve both goals: to travel and see the world, and to choose a career that allows me to make a positive and significant impact on the world around me.

Instead of dropping everything and living with the nomads in the hills in Grenada, I am returning home to start grad school on Tuesday. I embark on the next leg of my journey, with the world beckoning me like an open hand.